Does My Suit Make You Horny? I Mean... Hungry?

Bacon Scented Bacon Print Tuxedo

"There's a theory that everything is better with bacon. We believe that theory with all of our heart. To that end, we are introducing our line of bacon formal wear with Uncle Oinker's Bacon Scented Bacon Print Tuxedo. You can get married in bacon, get confirmed in bacon or go to the Oscars in bacon! Wait until Joan Rivers gets a whiff of you. Each Tuxedo is tailored from chemically treated latex print fabric in one of four different sizes. Best of all, it smells just like bacon sizzling in the pan. Dry clean only."

Me and one of my right hand mc's, Ryder EZ, have stated on numerous occasions that everything is better with bacon. But this concerns even me. Something about this "chemically treated latex print fabric" screams 'bad for your health' if you ask me... but you know what.. F IT.. you smell like fuckin bacon dude!! all day!! You're gonna get chicks all day long.. not the ones that you'll want to tell your friends about but still chicks.

I think that the bacon scientists that can invent wearable bacon could have come up with a better name than "Uncle Oinker's" but that could just be the fumes talkin. I'll let it slide.



Photo: mcphee.com